Idle hands: AC Schnitzer BMW X6 Falcon

Idle hands are the devil's playthings, and apparently AC Schnitzer has a lot of time on its hands. You're only required to read the first two lines of the company's press release to realize that the crew formerly known for creating rolling automotive masterworkz have officially donned their collective bouffants, made like the Fonz and jumped the shark. Here's proof: The BMW X6 Falcon.

Using the X5 Falcon as unfortunate inspiration, the X6 variant gets the same stretched out body work, giving the 'ute a 70mm wider track in the front and an additional 80mm in the rear. According to AC, extensive testing was done on the Nurburgring to hone the Falcon's high-speed prowess, aided by a new front lip, air intakes, repositioned fog lamps, side skirts and rear wing. Black or silver 22-inch Type VII wheels fill the massive arches and although it's not clear in the release, we suspect that some lowering springs were used to keep the ride-height in check.

As for power, the only models to benefit from engine tweaks are the X6 3.0d and 3.5d, boosting power to 272 hp (from 235 hp) and 310 hp (from 286 hp), respectively. And naturally, AC will sell you a set of chrome tailpipes, aluminum interior trim, pedals and floor mats emblazoned with its logo.

Hit the jump to read AC's comically overwrought press release.